Posts

Self Worth

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Recognize your own worth and you won't be drawn to those who don't see it.  -Doe Zantamata Always be aware of your feelings. They are the voice of your intuition…your inner truth.  A lot of times in relationships, people are very happy and excited to be in something new, and are very complimentary and notice all the good little things. Then after awhile, especially in those who are insecure, they lose that initial "niceness" and instead begin to get comfortable.  Eventually, some start to seem to notice only the little things they don't like or that bother them, and have forgotten all about the good little things.  This can happen subtly over time, so it's good to keep track of your inner feelings at all times. If you notice not feeling right, don't second guess yourself or talk yourself out of it. Reflect on that feeling and what it means to you.  There are some people who feel that once a person is "hooked," they do

The apology that counts the most

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You only need to hear and accept one apology, and it's not the one from the person who hurt you so many times. It is the one from yourself for keeping you there for so long. -Doe Zantamata

Self Worth

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Without self-worth: "I'm doing my best and they don't like me. What's wrong with me?" With self-worth: "I'm doing my best, and they don't like me. What's wrong with them?" Remember, it's not called, "That person's approval-worth," it's called "self-worth." When you approve of yourself, you lose the need to prove it to anyone else. -Doe Zantamata

One more try or enough is enough?

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Decision: Get back together or break up forever? Take the pressure off of yourself with the following thought: There is no "wrong" action, just choices and consequences. If you go back and it turns out to be the wrong thing, you'll know for sure. If you do not go back, you may always wonder if you should have given it one more go, or you may feel peace and relief of not having the anxiety for the same thing to happen again that had happened so many times. There's a part in each that will be resolved in the outside world, and a part in each that needs to be and can only be resolved within you. If you feel hesitant, it could be intuition or at this point it could be self-protection/fear of not wanting to return to that which you know has the ability to cause you great pain. Wherever you go, go fully. If you decide to go back, do so with optimism and not with anxiety. If you do not go back, move forward in life with curiosity to the new and not with regrets

A different person

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It would have been a great relationship if he had been more considerate, if he had made you more of a priority, if he'd been much more honest, and if he had been much more kind. But if he'd have been all those things, he'd have been a different person. So accept him as he is and let him go. That will make room in your life for the person who is all those things because he chooses to be, not because you wish he would become them. ~Doe Zantamata

Guilt is a motivator

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Guilt is a powerful motivator. It holds people trapped in places they don't want to be. It will eventually be fulfilled by resentment over a feeling of wasted time. No one really wants to hold you against your will, but they may not realize they're holding on out of fear instead of letting go with love. When you realize you're facing either certain unhappiness or the chance at possible happiness, the decision becomes much more clear. What's best for the long term isn't always what's easiest in the short term. Follow your heart. -Doe Zantamata

Second bliss

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First bliss comes naturally. Second bliss is a choice. It's the choice to trust, to love, to put yourself out there, knowing full well that you can get hurt. But you won't be able to live, love, and experience all the joys of life if you don't put yourself back out there again. It takes courage --a lot of courage-- but it's worth it. ~Doe Zantamata